I'm A Believer

The wonderful people of Nuffnang and Yehey! invited me and other moms to participate in the Bedtime Discoveries of J&J. For the first few events, I was sadly unable to go as I was 1. Near my due date! 2. In labor, and 3. Recovering! Lolz :D How incredible was that? I heard it was really fun and the events were a success.

Fortunately, I was able to catch the very last event celebrating the value of good sleep in babies' growth and development. I was able to see some of my friends, make new ones and feel assured that I AM on the right track concerning the steps I take to ensure my girls get a good night's rest.

Mommy Leirs, whom I haven't seen for over a year!

Pretty Mommy Erlyn and Mommy Leirs!

Doting Mommy Josephine with a sleepy Olly :D

Oops! Someone took Mommy Erlyn's pic and the flash was too bright!
Olly's thought bubble seems to be, "Whut?"

I was able to bring Olly while Oona and Daddy dropped by Lola's for a quick visit. As you can see, Olly was  sleepy for her mid-morning nap but because it was a bit noisy at Aquaknox (yummy vietnamese food!!!), she couldn't settle down. She was sleepy but it was also very exciting for her. She kept looking around, smiling and cooing at everyone who talked to her. Lolz! My baby's first event! :D

The complete Bedtime line!
We got the Bedtime bath, lotion and powder :) Yay!
I wasn't able to take a pic of my swag though as I had my hands full with Olly :D

I was also very happy when J&J thoughtfully gave us Bedtime Gift Packs with the bath, powder and lotion so we can put into practice what we learned about establishing routines for our babies to wind down for sleep. During nighttime sleep is when our bodies regenerate, heal and in our babies' new bodies, develop  (There was a very lovely, durable bag too, waterproofed with purple plastic inside so it's perfect to hold baby stuff!)

I've always been a J&J baby so now that I have kids of my own, I use J&J on them too. Of course there wasn't a Bedtime line in my infancy but the principle of touch therapy and bedtime routines have been part of the family tradition for as long as I can remember. It's reassuring and refreshing to know that tradition is fully supported by science and modern studies. What makes this routine even more special is the influence of aromatherapy in the formulation of this line. Lavender does have a calming property and its essential oil is good for the skin. Perfect for babies, toddlers and me too! :)

Go to http://www.babycenter.com.ph/bedtime, people! Find out more about what good sleep can do for your kids. Check if you're already doing it! :)

Moving To The Front Row

Change seems to be the theme for the rest of the year for me. Not just any change, mind you. Significant ones.

While I've had many, many changes in my life, both big and small, I can only count a few that I've truly decided upon, taken charge of and did not just leave up to fate.

Oona, Olly and Mommy

When Oona blew out the candles for her 3rd birthday last August 15, I couldn't help feeling that my baby was growing up too fast for me! Huffy puffy Mommy trying desperately to catch up with her mile-a-minute mind, rapid-fire questions and road-runner legs. Let's not forget 6 month old butterball Olly, challenging time and human evolution by constantly trying to crawl and stand ahead of schedule and fly off the bed, in defiance of gravity. It takes all the mommy powers I can muster to last the day with these two bundles of energy! So as Oona's candles poofed out, the idea of a change that MUST happen flared to life. I wanted to be more involved in the laughter and fun in their lives. I don't want to just exist from chore to chore, duty to duty, stretching what I had to cover what needed to be done for the kids. I wanted to have more out of the relationship we share. I didn't want to be too tired to enjoy being with them.

Really, most days, I'm too pooped to be fun, I'm short-tempered and more of an ogre than I care to admit. Sound familiar, anyone?

Like most mothers, our priorities revolve around the kids, our husbands and partners, our families. We put ourselves, by default, in second, third and even last place. But our roles, quite by paradox, always demand that we be at the front line of everything for the family. Yes, like soldiers.

We barely even have time for ourselves like we used to because there's the guilt that every available time and attention should be invested in the kids, the husband and the family or else you're not being a good wife or mother.

That's not fair, is it? Does that sound like your internal dialogue?

Let's be realistic. We can't expect others to take care of us. It would be great, yes! But we have to take the initiative to do things for ourselves. We can't expect martyrdom or a shaft of light from heaven transforming us into perfection. You'd have to be dead, I think and I want to be alive to enjoy myself.

In a nutshell, I want enough of me to go around and have something left for ME. I don't want to feel run down
anymore because I should be enjoying myself and the time I have with the kids. I know they won't be babies for long and sooner than I would like to, they'll be spreading their wings to fly solo. So for a change, I think I ought to put myself in the front row of my life, our family's life!

I want more. I want the place of privilege I know I deserve.

To be there not just as a frontliner at the trenches, but sitting pretty, joining in the fun and laughter, making good, happy memories, watching my kids and my family bloom and grow from my plush front row seat.

I am daring to be in front.

Pagbabago

Somebody said that changes in our lives are perceived differently by those around us. To others it may seem to be the death of your loved one or a triumphant event that changes you. However, the significant moment for you could be the simple shutting of a door, the glimpse of a small, secret smile or a leaf falling. For me it was a small strip changing color that rendered my universe virtually unrecognizable to me.

Oona!

This is Oona, my first born daughter. She celebrated her 3rd birthday last August 15 and as she blew out her candles, I couldn't help feeling that my baby seems to be growing up too fast for me.

Was it only a few years ago that I was “Boss Laya”, driven workaholic, weekend wanderer and tough bar regular?

With kindred free spirits!

My life has never been the same the moment I found out she was coming. I always felt I was too much of a free spirit until I met my husband, but it was only in 2007 when the home pregnancy-kit showed two pink strips did my world totally turn upside down. I actually never thought I'd get married, let alone have a child!

At first I felt numb, shell-shocked as I heard it to be. Then, nervous and not just a little afraid. Suddenly all these questions, insecurities and issues started popping out from nowhere! Would I be a good mother? Am I ready to be a parent? What do I DO now? I started to reach for a cigarette but caught myself in time. I quit right then and there, cold-turkey and sucked on a mint instead. Drinking booze and coffee went out the window too. Sooo many things to consider, adjust, change!

For pretty much the whole 9 months, I was in a state of mental and emotional upheaval. Not to mention the physical changes that terribly upset me. I felt that I lost all sense of control. My world had spun off its axis, I was at such odds with myself and my body had betrayed me: the dizziness, the mood swings, the bloating, the aches and pains, ad infinitum, ad nauseatum.  My morning sickness did not just attack in the mornings, by the way, nor did it limit itself to just a month. Bleh.

surprise baby shower at the office

My beloved hubby RF and I had been married two years, living on our own in a small apartment in Makati. Life had a hectic regularity of work, home, occasional breaks and more work from our BPO jobs. It was an awakening for me how sharply the feelings of isolation this new state of being could bring me. At work I was surrounded by kids just out of college and most friends my age were like me, worked hard and partied even harder. All self-possession and confidence deserted me as I could not find anyone to relate to and I felt so alone even as I felt the tiny being grow inside me. I think it would have helped if I was closer to family but it was impractical given my delicate condition and unforgiving working hours to be commuting everyday.

Make no mistake, though, we were really happy to find out we were pregnant. It was all just so unexpected for me, so unforeseen that I, the girl scout, was caught unawares.

I was also so very hungry and thirsty all the time! It was horrible when the food cravings or paglilihi started because not only was I very picky, the mood swings coincided with whether or not I got what I was craving for at the moment. Blame it on the hormones and the intense feelings these new changes brought about, but I truly craved the wholesome, home made comfort food of my childhood. You know how it is at times of uncertainty when you hark back to a simpler, uncomplicated, secure time, right? Home, childhood, the warm womb of family...What I remember was that I craved Dinuguan like my granduncle in Mindoro made, the Sinigang Na Baboy only my mother makes and the Nilaga my grandfather used to cook when he was still alive. Tall order for my poor hubby or the Kuya I asked to find me lunch everyday! They would try to find these in the nearby restaurants or eateries but it wasn’t everyday that any of these choices would be available.

Goldilock's Pasong Tamo, my saviour!

Strolling home one evening I was pleasantly surprised to find that there was a nearby Goldilocks branch. I remembered their Mamon and decided to buy some. When I entered, I found out that Goldilocks not only served cakes, pastries and breads, they had also begun serving full meals! At first I was skeptical but I couldn't resist when I saw right up there among the food choices were the meals I had been hungering for. Sinigang! Nilaga! Dinuguan! There was even Kare-kare! Oh, I was so very HAPPY! I couldn’t make up my mind what to try first!

Nilagang Baka

After what seemed like forever, I went with the Pork Sinigang, being pregnant and wanting something sour! I was happy with how much their servings were and my first spoonful of that soup sent me reeling back to a warm, happy place! Happy me! Happy belly! Happy baby! I ordered Dinuguan and puto (and extra rice) next (yes, I pigged out!) and for my take home baon, I had Nilaga wrapped up. Perfect for when I woke up at 3am, hungry for something warm and soupy!

I went home with a bellyful of happiness. I know, I sound unbelievably shallow when I say that food stabilized my teetering world! But it did, that night. All was right again. Imagine, I could have a taste of home any time I wanted to now! Apparently, on a deep psychological and emotional level, I equate food with comfort and security (like every other creature! Haha!). How the universe provides for us, doesn't it? It was a big bonus for me too that this branch in Pasong Tamo closed late so every time I was on night shift, I'd buy enough food to last me until the wee hours of the morning! 

Dinuguan

Of course, it was still different when it was my mom's cooking or my grandparents', but Goldilocks gave me a sense of what a home away from home is like, giving you comfort, a sense of security and that everything will be alright through all the changes you may go through. 

Oona, Olly and Daddy

So all throughout my pregnancy, Goldilocks nourished not only my baby, that little girl Oona, but also nurtured my sense of well-being and reminded me of family. The family that surrounded me, reaching through time and distance and the family I was about to have, assuring me that I wasn't alone, I would be fine and that these changes are part and parcel of the celebration of life.

My beautiful, intelligent, spunky little daughter is the spice of our lives! (She's now a doting Ate, by the way!) She's got as much personality as the Sinigang, warms your heart up like the Nilaga with her sweet ways and is as incredibly interesting as the Dinuguan is to a foreigner who's never had that dish. Hahahahaha! :) 


Thank you, Goldilocks! We probably should have named our daughter after you! :D 

GILT Kids Final Sales TONIGHT at 9pm ET with prices up to 80% off Retail!!!

MOMS! IT'S A SALE! By invitation and membership only of exclusive label sales, Gilt Kids trots out these super kiddilicious stuff for our little fashionistas! Get your invites and register to become members of Gilt Groupe and Gilt Children at: www.gilt.com/giltchildren.


Final Sale: Girls Apparel up to 80% off Sale Starts at 9PM ETIt’s a big sale for little fashionistas! Highly sought-after labels like Antik Batik, Baby Eggi and Tooby Doo make sure she’s dressed for the occasion, whether she’s joining you for weekend errands or playing with the boys. Check out the playground-ready rompers, sweet-as-pie frocks and colorful knits.

Selects:Antik Batik Long Sleeve Blouse, Original Retail: $115, Gilt: $51

  
Peek...Aren’t You Curious Gabriella Dress, Original Retail: $68, Gilt: $13


Peek...Aren’t You Curious Surf Board Short, Original Retail: $38, Gilt: $5


Clover New York Juno Birds Dress Organic, Original Retail: $60, Gilt: $25


DKNY CBG Skinny Pant, Original Retail: $39, Gilt: $9-$12


DKNY Printed Garden Way Dress, Original Retail, $58, Gilt: $13-$18

 
Final Sale: Boys Apparel up to 80% off, Sale starts 8/25 9PM ET
From casual playground duds to more formal wear, there are sweet deals here for every age and every day. Scoop up standouts like Velvet and Tweed’s suspender pants and casual tees with attached ties from Blume, plus cool kicks from Creative Recreation.

Selects:Blume Short Sleeve Little Man Tie Tee, Original Retail: $56, Gilt: $14-$15



Peek...Aren’t You Curious Idaho Tee, Original Retail: $34, Gilt: $9


Peek...Aren’t You Curious Plaid Dress Shirt, original Retail: $58, Gilt: $14


DKNY Track Jacket, Original Retail: $46, Gilt: $13-$14


DKNY Western Plaid Shirt, Original Retail: $36, Gilt: $10-$11


DKNY Straight Leg Jeans, Original Retail: $30, Gilt: $8-$9


DKNY Guitar Tee & Shorts Set, Original Retail: $38, Gilt: $11


Kids Final Sale: 80% off Toys, Shoes & Accessories, Sale starts 8/25 9PM ETToys for tots, plus finishing touches for little fashionistas: This selection has it all. Find puzzles and games from Mudpuppy Press, rainbow-bright hair ties from Emi-Jay and bamboo blanks from ShiShu Baby. Look to Little Miss Matched for in-your-face bright socks in whimsical prints, and top them off with playful kicks from Creative Recreation.

Selects:Paul Frank 9 Piece Diaper Tote Gift Set, Original Retail: $60, Gilt: $18


Paul Frank Julius Skull Diaper Bag, Original Retail: $80, Gilt: $24
 

 
     

Creative Recreation Youth Cesario, Original Retail: $65, Gilt: $16


Sir Henry Dog Doll and Booklet, Original Retail: $120, Gilt: $36


ShiShu Baby Natural Bamboo Blanket 40” by 30”, Original Retail: $68, Gilt: $38

Get Exclusive Shopper's Gilt. By Invitation Only.

I love shopping online!

So for all you brothers and sisters in shopaholism out there, I'm sharing the love!



Launched in November 2007, Gilt Groupe has rapidly established itself as one of the leading online retailers in the US. Headquartered in New York City, Gilt curates a broad range of daily sales in the areas of women’s fashion and accessories, men’s apparel and lifestyle, home, children and travel, to serve to its exclusive, invitation-only membership. Most sales last just 36 hours and feature many of the world’s most sought-after designers.

Recently, Gilt Groupe expanded its offerings for Gilt Children, providing more than 150 top brands in new product categories including apparel, footwear, room décor, furniture, gear, toys and books in addition to Gilt’s already wide array of product offerings. Additional brands being featured in Gilt Children’s category expansion include Baby Bjorn, Appaman, Argington Furniture, Jacadi, Petit Patapon and Plan Toys.

Stefan Pepe, General Manager of Gilt Children says, “We understand that moms have a busy lifestyle and wanted to provide her with a carefully curated, one-stop shopping experience for the brands that she loves for herself, her kids and her home.”

“In true Gilt Groupe style, their buyers have hand-selected pieces from the hottest names in children’s fashion to bring an impressive lineup of labels each day. I was so excited to hear about the expansion of Gilt Children and all of its offerings,” says Ellen Diamant, Founder of Skip Hop.

“Gilt Groupe’s one-stop-shop dynamic has just taken the shopping experience to the next level, providing everything designer in apparel, accessories and décor,” says Elephantito designer Maria Frallicciardi. “Gilt now accommodates every age with its expansion into the Children’s category.”

So go, get your invitation to exclusive label deals! For mommies who want to become a member of Gilt Children, please visit www.gilt.com/giltchildren.

Go for the gilt, people! :D

WE CAN AFFORD BORA!!! :D

Wow!

It used to be that when one says Boracay, it automatically means uber expensive. So much so that I'd been advised to just go to Hong Kong with how much I'd be spending.

So naturally I was sceptical when my good friend Joylyn emailed me info that the Boracay Regency has available packages for less than Php 100.00 a day!

I'M NOT KIDDING.

Boracay Island Guide (BIG) partnered with CNM Travel &Tours along with all major credit cards to bring US the lowest Boracay package available ANYWHERE online! This includes a 3-day and 2-night stay at Boracay Regency for two with daily breakfast served in the comfort of your room. Airfare and transfers for two via Zest Air (Caticlan) are also included.

Boracay Island Guide (BIG) contains the most complete Boracay information of flights, accommodations, resorts and all of Boracay's finest beach offerings (waterskiing, banana boat rides, glass bottom boats and not to mention the all-time favorite island hopping!). Over 200 restaurants and eateries are listed for your eating pleasure! You can also look for “pasalubong” in Boracay from wet markets to malls, and flea markets like The Talipapa, with its numerous stalls, stores and boutiques for clothes, souvenirs and jewelry.

LOWEST BORACAY TRAVEL PACKAGES FROM THE BORACAY ISLAND GUIDE!

Traveling on a budget, Boracay Island Guide offers the perfect package suited just for us budget bugs!

Aside from all the basic details that you need to know about Boracay, they have offer travel packages to the Boracay Regency, Boracay Garden and Regency Lagoon, where top of the line accommodations, facilities and services can be experienced.

And now, they are launching the latest and lowest Boracay package ever! Stay at the Boracay Regency for as low as Php72.81 per day! Enjoy Boracay’s white sand and pay less than your favorite Starbucks frappucino everyday! Can you believe it?!

You can even enjoy deferred payment of your Boracay package! Boracay Island Guide has partnered with major credit cards such as HSBC, Metrobank, Eastwest, Banco de Oro, AIG, Diner’s Club International, Security Bank, Union Bank and Allied Bank to give you the opportunity to pay for your Boracay package at 0% interest for 6 months! No payment worries!

Check out Boracay Island Guide at http://www.boracay-island-guide.com for more information and book your Boracay Regency package now at http://www.boracay-island-guide.com/boracay-regency.html. GOGOGOGO! :D See you there!

Be a fan over Facebook (http://www.facebook.com/hotdealsonlineph) or follow them on Twitter (http://www.twitter.com/hotdealsol) for regular updates about Boracay travel packages and other hot deals you can find online!

my heart breaks :( the quirino bloodbath

IS THIS FOR REAL?

Postcripts To A BloodBath

Mr. Mendoza was already upset even before he saw on television what the policemen did to his brother. The other tourists who remained inside the bus were complaining. Wei Ji Jiang wanted to go to the bathroom. Dao Chi Yu was hungry and the rest were just groaning and whining like they have forgotten that our lives rest in Mr. Mendoza's hands.

The hostage taker, as you know him was really nice. He treated us okay and even let the elders and the children leave the bus. He said your policemen treated him unfairly. He was a policeman too and was accused of doing something he had no knowledge of. But your government didn't listen so he used us to get everyone's attention.

Things would have never turned for the worst if he didn't see how his family was dragged out of their house and taken into custody. He was watching the news all the time as we huddled around each other behind the bus. He shouted some words in your language then started shooting in the air. A girl about my age started screaming. Mr. Mendoza demanded her to stop but she didn't understand English. God, he had to slash her neck with a knife just to put her to rest. Her boyfriend who tried to hit him was shot in the head.

Tension was rising. You can see in his face how scared and confused he was. The bus driver ran away leaving him alone with strangers from a distant land. I can see him walking across the aisle, sometimes pointing his machine gun to one of the tourists. But he tried his best not to hurt us, especially those who really cooperate.

I guess its in your nature not to inflict pain on others unless it was necessary. I remember him saying that he will free us before sundown and implored us to forget everything when we return home. But his words don't matter now. The policemen were trying to force their way in, while we all lied down to shield ourselves from bullets. Mister Mendoza blindly shoots at his enemies which I think kept them from rescuing us. I hear sobs under the chairs. Some were even shouting the names of their loved ones even when the air merely eat their words. Kevin Tang tried to escape when the glass door was was shattered, but one shot and he slumped on the floor with blood gushing from his mouth.

Heavy rain pitter-pattered on the rooftop. In old Chinese saying, it means an end to a struggle. Finally, somebody was able to open the escape hatch at the back of the bus. Freedom. But I knew Mister Mendoza was still alive. I knew he was just waiting for a chance to strike back at his enemies. So I told those around me not to escape. Let the authorities come for us instead. Then there was gunfire. He was firing at his enemies with a machine gun. Those who were at the escape hatch fled abandoning us once again. It's like a nightmare with no end and to wake up means a certain death. Then somebody from outside the bus threw a canister. It forced out a black smoke that is so painful to the eyes and putrid smelling to the nose. People started screaming. We cannot breathe. Some ran in front of the bus but Mister Mendoza warned them of stray bullets. It was too late. One was hit on the head, the other was hit on the shoulders. Bullets were now flying. Its like the authorities thought we were all dead. Mister Mendoza finally admits his mistake and said sorry to everyone, dead or alive. He then ran towards the front of the bus where he would meet his maker. As he passed by my chair with bullets whistling overhead, I clutched my hand on the velvet curtain and wrapped it around my face. All I could think of was to stay alive - for my child who is waiting for me back in Xinjang. I know I will survive,

I will come home.

Bang Lu Min

Survivor, Quirino Bloodbath

UPDATES OF A YEAR LATER

rf's girls

This is us now.

Oona, our firecracker, the livewire, our chatterbox of a little girl. She's so excited with everything. Stricken with acute bronchitis early January 2010, she was so dehydrated that she couldn't make a sound for about a week. When she recovered, it was as if all the words she ever heard in the few years she spent on earth were bursting out of her mouth even if she still couldn't say them all properly.

i love chips mom.

She often gets frustrated that she can't be understood or express the burgeoning feelings and thoughts filling her ever growing heart and mind. She's so much a little girl, a big baby and a wise sentient being all rolled into one huggable bundle. I sometimes have difficulty remembering she's a child whenever something amazingly profound or unexpected comes out of her mouth. She jumps, she sings, she dances and has two imaginary friends, Mort (or is it Mork?) and Kays she talks to on any phone. She is also now fully toilet trained. Just like that, in diapers one day, in ruffled panties the next. Sure she had a few accidents and we carried diapers for a few days (still do for long trips and no-available-toilet emergencies), but it wasn't months or years of bed-wetting et al.

She's very protective of her little sister Olly whom she calls her baby. I can only hope and pray that they become each other's best friend when they grow up. Knowing that they look out for each other is enough for me and I can die in peace.

I feel GOOD!
tananananananaaaa!!!

Olivia Eleanor was born one fine night, 1042pm on February 19, 2010 at 40 weeks. I was induced as the OB didn't want to risk Olly going past her due date. With my epidural fix, I wasn't  in terrible pain and everything went well. RF was able to join me after a minor delay at the nurses' station where they were hesitant to take RF's bag and laptop. They finally took it when our anesthesiologist ran out and scolded them for keeping him there while Olly was already crowning for about 5 minutes already! I was on a pause button for five minutes waiting for him while he argued outside the DR.

mommy's three babies!

Anyhoo, Olly came out, beautiful baby! with nary a hitch. After two hours, that's when I started bleeding a lot. I felt like I was dumped into a vat of ice! I was breastfeeding Olly in the recovery room when I felt like the worst  hangover ever. I was so thirsty, my mouth was so dry but I felt leaden and my limbs were blocks of ice. I told the nurse to get Olly, check my bleeding and that I'm about to pass out (which I promptly did)...Next thing I knew I was swimming in and out of consciousness, faces and voices floated around me and the ceiling lights kept changing. It turned out that I had what a uterine atony where the uterus could not contract and therefore could not stop pouring blood long enough for clotting to happen. I had to be reexamined and cleaned out to rule out a hysterectomy, bags of blood and plasma were transfused and family were called to be informed of how near I was to critical level. From a hypertensive 150-130/80 BP range, I had plunged to 90/50.

All that time I just kept praying that I live through it, intact, whole and still capable of at least one more child. I still wanted to give RF a son, give the world a chance to have another gentleman out there. The worst case scenario was the hysterectomy (the uterus would be taken out) and I did not want that. However, as the doctors said, it's your uterus or your life. Life, of course (but can I have my uterus too, pretty please?).

Anyhoo, it was all uphill from there. I recovered and my uterus is still here. RF and I agreed that we would wait a few years before having a third child. We want to focus on these two first, give my body a chance to heal and yes, our finances to stabilize a bit before welcoming another angel into our family.

It's been a riotous year. All in all, so much the rollercoaster ride. I have yet to experience uninterrupted sleep, a steady diet and more peaceful, quiet "me" times. RF and I have no date nights and a rare five minute shower all by myself still feels like a luxury.

But looking at these kids makes it all worth it. Oh so very much worth it all.